Finding reason to celebrate

Thanksgiving is a bittersweet time for Dejane Kidder.

Three years ago on Nov. 25, the Olivet School fourth-grader lost her adoptive mother to a rare disorder that inflames blood vessels and leads to organ failure.

Two weeks before that devastating event, Thai, the family's cat, had to be put down.

"I never knew it would happen," Dejane said. "Every time I came home from school, I'd say, 'Where's Thai?' But when I asked, no cat came over. That was pretty sad."

But this Thanksgiving morning, the 9-year-old will wake to the sound of purring, courtesy of the kitten she brought home from a shelter. For a girl who was rescued from foster care, only to suffer the death of her benefactor, such a sound really will be something to celebrate.

"I'm thankful for getting a new kitty, and that Obama won," Dejane (pronounced Day-ja-nee) said in regard to her new pet, dubbed Paws, and the nation's president-elect.

Dejane's story is a different twist on the oft-told tale of those who choose the holidays as an ideal time to adopt a pet. The Humane Society & SPCA of Sonoma County on Highway 12 had so many adoptions last weekend that officials there joked they nearly ran out of animals.

While every one of these adoptions represents a story, it's hard to top the heart-tugging tale of a girl who had come to associate the death of a pet with that of her mother.

Rachel Kidder was single and living in Oakland in 2001 when she became a foster parent to Dejane. A year later, Kidder formally adopted the girl.

They were enjoying their lives together when Kidder was diagnosed with Wegener's granulomatosis, a rare disorder of unknown cause that produces a type of inflammatory tissue known as granuloma, which is found around the blood vessels. Granulomas can destroy normal tissue.

"Dejane in the beginning blamed herself for Rachel's death," said Susan Kidder, Rachel Kidder's mother. "I've had to keep saying to her, 'Nothing you could have done could have saved Rachel's life. You made her happier than she'd ever been.' "

Susan Kidder, 76, and her husband, Noel, 75, are both retired analysts for the Los Angeles Unified School District. After their daughter's death, the couple moved to Oakland to take care of Dejane.

They relocated to Santa Rosa, so that Dejane could be raised near another relative.

Dejane is remarkably well-adjusted, given the difficulties in her life. That includes earning A's and B's at Olivet.

But sad feelings persist.

Several nights ago, Dejane and her grandmother were sharing a quiet moment when the girl suddenly asked how old her mother would have been had she lived. The answer: 44.

"I said, 'What made you ask?' And she said, 'I don't know. I was just thinking about her and her laugh,' " Susan Kidder recalled.

On Monday evening, the Kidders, who are Jewish, lit a candle for Yahrtzeit, which honors the anniversary of someone's death.

Amid these somber remembrances, Dejane is finding comfort in her new friend.

As a surprise for Dejane's birthday last month, the Kidders picked her up from school and took her to the Humane Society shelter, where they adopted the gray kitten.

Such connections can make a big difference in the lives of children who are experiencing trauma, said Angie Bonnert, the Humane Society's spokeswoman.

The Humane Society's Forget Me Not Farm program provides animal-assisted therapy to at-risk children and those from abusive homes.

"Animals are amazing teachers and healers and provide what no human can -- unconditional love," Bonnert said.

It's already working for Dejane, who now is looking forward to spending time with her family and her new furry friend.

"I can't wait for a holiday, because I've never really had a holiday with him," she said of Paws.

You can reach Staff Writer Derek J. Moore at 521-5336 or derek.moore@pressdemocrat.com.