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COHN: Jim Harbaugh spins fairy-tale yarn on PED use

  • San Francisco 49ers head coach Jim Harbaugh during practice at the team's NFL football training facility in Santa Clara, Calif., Tuesday, June 11, 2013. (AP Photo/Marcio Jose Sanchez)


“Fairy tales can come true, it can happen to you.”

Who knew, big Jim Harbaugh is a spinner of fairy tales? God love him.

When did Jim Harbaugh tell a fairy tale?

He told a fairy tale on Tuesday.

What fairy tale did the 49ers' coach tell?

The 49ers' coach said his players are squeaky clean when it comes to taking performance-enhancing drugs. Harbaugh didn't merely say his players are clean. He announced it.

Let's listen to the 49ers' coach on illegal drugs:

“Has no place in an athlete's body. Play by the rules. And you always want to be above reproach. Especially when you're good, because you don't want people to come back and say, 'They're winning because they're cheating.' So, we want to be above reproach in everything, and do everything by the rules. Because if you cheat to win, then you've already lost.”

As fairy tales go, this is right up there with the Brothers Grimm, especially that part about 49ers players being above reproach — although Harbaugh never actually said all his players are above reproach. He said he wants them to be.

Because, get this, the Niners players are not above reproach. I believe there's plenty of reproach where they are concerned. There's plenty of reproach where every NFL team is concerned. It is my opinion the league is rife with PED cheating. Football is a game of power, quickness and explosion. Some PEDs specialize in augmenting power, quickness and explosion. Some players can't resist using them.

Since 2010, the NFL suspended 50 players for PEDs. The league never discloses what drug was found in players. The players often cop to Adderall, a stimulant with amphetamine, even though they often take steroids and HGH. Adderall doesn't sound as bad. Call it the “beard” drug of choice.

Harbaugh knows all this. Well, I think he knows all this. If he doesn't, he's the most naïve man on the planet.

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