Dear Abby: I’ve had a feeling my wife is about to leave me for another man. For the last few months he has been coming to the bar where she works and saying stuff to her. I don’t know what he says, but he has also been texting her and posting things on her Facebook page.
She told me he’s only a friend, but since he has been coming around at her work, she’s been really cold to me at night. We don’t have sex like we used to, and she doesn’t let me hold her when we are in bed. Plus, she used to sleep nude, but now she wears pajamas to bed.
What should I do? She told me I need to get help because I’m jealous of him.
— Jealous in Oregon
Dear Jealous: I think “help” would be a good idea. Tell your wife you’re willing to get some on the condition that she come with you. It’s called marriage counseling, and clearly you both are in need of some. Your doctor can refer you to a licensed therapist. Also, if you have a religious adviser, make an appointment to talk with him or her. If your wife refuses, do both of these things without her. Please don’t wait.
Dear Abby: I’m a 15-year-old sophomore. People in my class openly share their opinions and act disgusted when a slightly older man and a younger woman are together, or vice versa.
I get offended when my classmates make these comments because my mom is 39 and my stepfather is 27. They love each other very much, and I don’t think age should interfere. Am I oversensitive because I’m offended by these comments?
— Age is Just a Number
Dear Age: Becoming offended solves nothing, unless the comments are made specifically about your mom and stepdad. It’s my observation that people with little life experience tend to be judgmental about things they know nothing about, and 15-year-olds are no exception. Perhaps when your classmates are older, they’ll realize that people don’t fall in love “by the numbers” and that it’s a mistake to generalize.
THIS WEEK’S BLIND TASTING
Cabernet Sauvignon, the venerable statesman
Rodney Strong, 2015 Sonoma County Cabernet Sauvignon, 13.5% alcohol, $20. ★★★★
This is a cab that clearly overdelivers. It has generous fruit — black cherry and black raspberry — with herbs and spicy oak. It has good structure with firm tannins and a nice length.
J. Lohr, 2015 Hilltop, Paso Robles Cabernet Sauvignon, 14.9%, $35. ★★★★: This is a pretty cab with black raspberry fruit, herbs and spice, and the flavors meld together seamlessly. The cab has good balance, ripe tannins and a lingering finish. It’s well-crafted.
Duckhorn, 2014 Three Palms Vineyard, Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon, 14.9%, $98. ★★★★: This is a gorgeous cab with notes of black raspberry fruit, and notes of cinnamon and clove in the mix. It has a soft and supple texture, with ripe tannins. Nice length. Striking.
Cliff Lede, 2015 Stag’s Leap District, Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon, 15%, $78. ★★★★: This is a striking cab with complex aromas and flavors. It has notes of jasmine, black currant, blackberry, cinnamon and black pepper. The Cliff Lede has bright acidity and great balance. Top rate.
Justin, 2015 Paso Robles Cabernet Sauvignon, 14.5%, $25. ★★★1/2: This is a savory cab with dried herbs at the forefront, while cherry and black currant fruit play backup. What melds it together is a hint of caramel. Smart.