Dear Abby: Frustrated boyfriend is upset by woman's success

Dear Abby: I recently graduated from college, and like a lot of fresh graduates, I had difficulty finding employment for several months. However, I was just offered a position far better than anything I could have asked for. This position is much closer to my dream job than a simple entry-level one, and I am over-the-moon happy. The problem is my partner, 'Gavin.'

Gavin graduated the semester before I did. He was in a different degree program, and he's still without a job. He applies for dozens of jobs a day, gets at least one interview a week, and then, after they ask about his less-than-stellar GPA, he never hears from them again. He has become increasingly frustrated about his inability to find employment in his field, and recently has been projecting his frustration on our relationship.

I want to be able to celebrate my accomplishment with my partner. I need Gavin's support and excitement for me over this new position, but I'm torn because every time I tell him a new detail about it, I can see in his face how upset he is. What can I do so I am not compromising my happiness trying not to upset him?

— Working Woman in Orlando, Fla.

Dear Working Woman: The first thing I'd recommend is, out of respect for your partner's sensitive feelings, to refrain from crowing about your jubilation. It may take Gavin a while to find the job he's looking for in his field, or he may have to consider taking something outside of his field until he can network enough to find his dream job.

No two people's career paths are the same. Witness the Hollywood marriages in which one spouse becomes successful more quickly than the other. However, if you and Gavin are sensitive to each other's feelings — and mature — you can make it through this challenging period.