Jack DeMeo, attorney and civic leader, dies at 82

Jack DeMeo, a preeminent Sonoma County trial attorney who grew his family’s Depression-era law practice and became renowned as much for his community leadership and civility as for his dogged brilliance in the courtroom, died Thursday at his Santa Rosa home. He was 82.

DeMeo, a native son of Santa Rosa, practiced law in the city for 58 years and only in recent months was forced to ease back from work by the effects of myeloma, a cancer of the blood.

Born into an Italian-American family that worked to overcome many of the obstacles facing immigrants in the early 20th century, he became one of the most successful local attorneys of his generation, known around town for his passion for horse racing and for his steady contribution to charitable and community causes. He helped launch the foundation that supports the Valley of the Moon Children’s Home, was a trustee in the earliest days of Cardinal Newman High School and served for years on the board of the Sonoma County Fair.

DeMeo made himself an expert in many areas of civil law, earning recognition in the legal field across the state and country.

“He was a scholar, author and someone who was a master of a host of specialties: litigation, banking, estate, equine, criminal, real estate,” said former Santa Rosa city attorney Brien Farrell, who began his career with DeMeo’s firm.

Short in stature and long on diligence and caring, he was thrust into law and community service by inspiration from the generation of DeMeos that preceded him. He in turn inspired subsequent generations: son Brad DeMeo is a Sonoma County Superior Court judge and granddaughter Emily DeMeo a few years ago joined her grandfather’s firm, DeMeo DeMeo & West.

The practice was founded in 1934 by Jack DeMeo’s father, J.N. “Nick” DeMeo and Nick’s brother, Charles “Chop” DeMeo. Nick DeMeo was widely recognized for his efforts to bring greater efficiency to the state’s legal system; Charles DeMeo was elected mayor of Santa Rosa in 1966 and upon his death in 1995 left his city the multimillion-dollar bequest that built Chop’s Teen Club.

John F. “Jack” DeMeo was fresh from the UC Hastings College of Law in 1958 when he joined what was then his father and uncle’s Santa Rosa law firm, DeMeo & DeMeo. He became known as tireless and thorough. As a bonus, he was also faithfully good-humored and genteel.

“You know,” said Mike Senneff, another of the region’s most highly regarded lawyers and a friend of nearly 50 years, “when Jack walked into a room, there was an aura of respect. People showed respect for him, and they showed respect for one another.”

Ken Blackman, the retired Santa Rosa city manager, remembers DeMeo having a civilizing effect on contentious issues argued before city officials.

“He had a calming demeanor about him,” Blackman said. “He never added to the excitement or the throwing of insults back and forth.”

In an interview with a legal magazine, DeMeo once advised young attorneys, “work hard, be honest, be courteous and be professional. Because if you don’t do all those things, it’s going to get around and do harm to your business. That doesn’t mean don’t be aggressive - just be polite about it.”

A forceful advocate for his clients, DeMeo followed his own advice, avoiding personal affronts or obfuscation, Blackman said.

“Frequently, attorneys get in there and they get things so confused that nobody can tell what the hell was problem was in the first place. But not Jack,” Blackman said.

Longtime Sonoma County criminal defense lawyer Steve Turer said DeMeo ranked among the “cream of the cream” of the county’s attorneys, “not just for their legal work but for everything else they do as human beings in the community.”

Farrell, the former Santa Rosa city attorney, recalled that when he joined DeMeo and his father, Nick, in their firm in 1979, he was expected to put in six-day work weeks, as did the father-and-son pair.

The small firm regularly went toe to toe with big-city counterparts.

“Time after time,” Farrell said, “Jack would just batter them and end up with a settlement or a decision.”

DeMeo’s son, Brad, said his father was stirred especially by cases where his client had been harmed by another’s recklessness or neglect.

“He had a volcanic, internal drive to protect that person and make sure they were compensated,” said the younger DeMeo, who left the family law firm in 2011 upon being appointed to the bench by then-Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Jack DeMeo showed the same unwavering resolve when he set out to boost the lives and prospects of children removed from their homes because of abuse.

Along with retired Sonoma County Judge Arnie Rosenfield, DeMeo formed the foundation that supports the Valley of the Moon Children’s Home, a group home for abandoned, neglected and abused kids. He served on the board until earlier this year and for years awarded scholarships to children who found refuge at the home.

“He literally changed lives,” said Laura Colgate, current president of the Valley of the Moon Foundation. “He was a rock.”

DeMeo and his wife, best friend and sweetheart since their teens, the former Judy Revard, quietly donated to myriad local causes and encouraged young people to aspire. In 2011, financial support given and rallied by the DeMeos allowed a group of drama students at Santa Rosa’s Elsie Allen High School to perform at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe in Scotland.

DeMeo was a longtime, essential supporter of the private Cardinal Newman High School in Santa Rosa. The Catholic school acknowledged his contributions and leadership with one of its first John Henry Newman awards.

Laura Held, the school’s president since 2014, saw the DeMeos last year at a reception for current and past recipients of the honor. At that event, she said, there was no one guests were keener to buttonhole than Jack and Judy DeMeo.

Held said the couple always exhibited “wonderful simplicity” as they endowed scholarships and inspired endeavor. They “didn’t want any big recognition,” she said.

He also was a key booster of Piner High’s pursuit of lights for its football stadium

The DeMeos had three children of their own. Their first-born, Thomas, died at 18 in an automobile crash in 1972. Son Brad DeMeo, the judge, lives in Bodega Bay and daughter Nancy DeMeo in Windsor. The couple also have six grandchildren. The family plans to hold a memorial at a future date.

Jack DeMeo’s leadership, community network and energy benefited the Sonoma County Fair, where he was first appointed to the board in the 1960s and served as president in 1976.

He and Judy DeMeo were regulars at the racetrack, where they were known for their decades of breeding and raising thoroughbreds.

Jack DeMeo once recalled he’d been enthralled with horses since age 19. ?“I remember it started when someone was sending a horse to the slaughterhouse and I said, ‘Don’t do that.’?”

“The fair board looked to him for his advice, especially on the horseracing part,” said former fair manager Jim Moore.

“He was very much a legitimate horseman, a very classy guy,” Moore said. “He was serious about it, and he did it in the right way.”

DeMeo was a lover of music and serious student of jazz and a jazz pianist.

Among the old friends who came to DeMeo’s bedside in recent days was fellow Santa Rosa native Gene Traverso, the retired grocer and banker.

“We were at St. Rose (School) together over 70 years ago,” Traverso said. “It’s a blessing that I’ve known and had a friend like this.”

He said the community will never know all that DeMeo did for it.

“He led a full life and he deserves all the accolades and prayers that people could give him,” said Traverso.

“He was a first-class guy, that’s all you can say. When you’re a gentleman, you’re a gentleman all the way.”