Trio of fatal Sonoma County domestic violence cases have men as victims

Homicides are nothing new in Sonoma County courts. And domestic violence killings aren’t unheard of. But two cases currently in the court system are rare — domestic violence homicides in which the victims are men.

The suspects, a woman and a man, are charged with murder in their partners’ deaths. A third case ended with the suicide of the suspect.

The three cases caught the eye of local domestic violence advocates because of the rarity of the male victims, particularly three within a four-month period.

“We’re very concerned about the escalation of domestic violence-related homicides,” said Denise Frey, the executive director of the Sonoma County YWCA, which operates a domestic abuse hotline and provides services to victims.

“We had gone quite some time in Sonoma County without one, and then to have three apparent domestic violence homicides in such a short time is very concerning,” she said. “And all three were men. That is not typical.”

The trial for Bret Matz, 47, of Monte Rio is nearing opening arguments. He is accused of beating to death his 46-year-old partner, Robert Guess, with a lamp on Jan. 2.

A preliminary hearing is set to be held Wednesday for Sheyna Douprea, 24, accused of stabbing to death her boyfriend, Daniel Mooney, 46, in his Healdsburg apartment Dec. 14.

The third killing, the death of Conrad Wright, 68, apparently at the hands of his 59-year-old wife, Ruby, in their Santa Rosa home April 10, ended with the suicide of Ruby Wright after she was released on bail pending court proceedings.

The cases also raise questions because both Guess and Mooney had sought restraining orders against their alleged abusers, but abandoned the process in the months before their deaths.

According to state law enforcement statistics, roughly 80 percent of domestic violence homicide victims are females.

In 2004, the most recent statistics available from the Department of Justice, Sonoma County law enforcement officers responded to 2,045 calls reporting domestic violence. From those calls, 718 arrests were made, 550 of which were men and 168 were women.

The only domestic violence homicide that year involved a Richmond man who shot his ex-girlfriend. He was sentenced to 50-years-to-life in prison.

The Douprea and Matz cases also share two other characteristics that are common to domestic abuse situations, according to court documents and testimony. Both couples had a history of domestic violence, and alcohol and drugs were involved.

The fact that both Mooney and Guess dropped efforts to seek protection is also troubling, said men’s advocate Joe Manthey of Petaluma.

“Domestic violence is an underreported crime, especially when men are victims,” he said. “Men are much less likely to call the police. There absolutely is a shame attached to it. No man, including myself, wants to admit that he got beat up, especially by a woman.”

YWCA director Frey agreed there are differences for male victims. Her organization offers counseling and services to men also.

“One question is, were all the services offered to women offered to these men?” she said.

One of the homicide victims was a client of the YWCA at one time, she said, but she wouldn’t be more specific because of the confidential nature of the work. She acknowledged male victims react differently to domestic abuse.

“Guys don’t ask for help. It’s the stereotypical, ‘It doesn’t happen to men,’ ” she said. “The reality is, it doesn’t matter whether they are male or female, victims of domestic violence suffer the same fear.”

Douprea, who has had two domestic violence convictions in Sonoma County since 2006, is accused of stabbing Mooney twice in the neck with a pocket knife.

Douprea initially told police she’d arrived at Mooney’s home to find him wounded and reached a busy signal several times while trying to call 911. But later she told police she’d stabbed him with a knife she “kept for protection.” Mooney also had bite marks on his upper body, according to court documents.

The pair had an off-and-on romantic relationship for about a year but, according to Mooney’s family, were trying to make it work. Douprea was on probation for both of the previous domestic abuse cases and in 2007 was ordered to restart a 52-week domestic violence class, which court records show she hadn’t completed after the first conviction.

Her attorney, Jamie Thistlethwaite, has indicated she will introduce evidence that Douprea acted in self-defense in Mooney’s death.

Douprea, who worked as a temporary employee in The Press Democrat’s pre-press department, sent a letter to a reporter last month suggesting she was the victim in an abusive relationship.

The account in her letter, told in the third person, bears great similarities to Douprea’s situation: a single mom in her 20s with a boyfriend in his 40s. The couple in the story fought.

“She put a weapon in her pocket for protection,” the hand-written letter reads. “She tried to resolve things peacefully, but he choked her. This time he was going to kill her.

“She used the weapon to protect herself, but had no intention of killing him, just scaring him enough to back off. But he ended up dying.”

Like Douprea, Matz had a history of violence against his partner, according to court documents. Guess was stabbed three months before his death, allegedly by Matz. The case, a felony assault, was dismissed after Guess requested the restraining order against Matz be removed.

Several Monte Rio residents testified at Matz’s preliminary hearing that it was common knowledge he and Guess had a turbulent relationship, particularly when they drank.

Its unknown why Guess dropped the restraining order request. Maybe he was trying to be strong or felt the court system was biased against male victims, Manthey said.

“Domestic violence against men is seen as a joke in this culture,” he said, adding that male victims are often thought of as “wimpy” or “weak.”

A Sonoma County health department report for 2005 through 2009 listed several gaps in resources and services for domestic abuse victims, including the need for greater attention for male victims and female perpetrators.

The report also said there was a lack of gender-specific support and counseling for male victims. It also recommended a change in thinking to acknowledge that both parties can instigate or contribute to domestic violence.

“Men are today where women were 30 years ago as far as being invisible victims,” said Manthey. “The battered women’s advocates have done a tremendous job in bringing to light this issue with the public. . . . It’s time to turn the light onto battered men. Too bad it’s taken three murders.”