Rubino: All-Shunned All-Stars would be hard to beat

This is one man’s variation of fantasy baseball. Indulge this man for the next few minutes. Please.

There are certain players who’ve been banned from the Hall of Fame or otherwise ignored or marginalized by the baseball establishment, and these players as a team not only could give Tuesday’s real-life All-Stars more than they could handle, but conceivably they could give guys named Ruth, Cobb, Mays, Aaron and other immortals nine competitive innings.

Introducing the All-Shunned All-Stars.

FIRST BASE: MARK MCGWIRE

Appearing before a congressional committee looking into steroids, Big Mac didn’t want to talk about the past. Now Hall of Fame voters don’t want to discuss a future with him in Cooperstown. No matter. His 583 home runs and on-base percentage of .394 over a 16-year career make him a shoo-in to start for the All-Shunned All-Stars.

SECOND BASE: JEFF KENT

It’s a head-scratcher as to why Kent has received such anemic Hall of Fame support in his two years of eligibility. Maybe the best power-hitting second baseman ever (no disrespect to Rogers Hornsby), Kent hit 377 homers over a 17-year career, driving in more than 100 runs eight times, including six consecutive seasons with the Giants. He was also a five-time All-Star and an NL MVP.

THIRD BASE: PETE ROSE

Forget his 4,256 hits, a record that will never be broken. Forget that he was selected as an All-Star at five positions over 16 Mid-Summer Classics. What might be most impressive is his writing not one but two autobiographies, the second one pretty much declaring the first one a lie, with an opportunity now to write a third autobiography that would explain away the lies contained in the second. Talk about versatility.

SHORTSTOP: ALEX RODRIGUEZ

The All-Shunned All-Stars would probably prefer a younger, more innocent version of A-Rod, perhaps the dynamic 22-year-old Seattle Mariner of 1998, when he had 213 hits and nearly became the first 50/50 player before finishing with 42 homers and 46 steals.

LEFT FIELD: SHOELESS JOE JACKSON

The extent of Jackson’s involvement with seven Chicago White Sox teammates who conspired with gamblers to purposely lose the 1919 World Series comes up periodically for vigorous debate. What isn’t debatable is his .356 career batting average, third-best all-time. The All-Shunned All-Stars would take Shoeless Joe for his 1912 season alone, when with Cleveland he had 226 hits, including 44 doubles and 26 triples, and 35 steals. True, his batting average that year dropped 13 points from the previous season. Still, .395 with a .458 on-base percentage isn’t too shabby.

CENTER FIELD: BARRY BONDS

Bonds, primarily a left fielder, started 156 games in center during his 22-year career. That’s good enough for the All-Shunned All-Stars. Sure, Bonds brings his 762 homers, seven MVP awards, eight Gold Gloves and two batting titles to the All-Shunned All-Stars. But he also brings 688 intentional walks and 514 stolen bases. The former indicates unprecedented long-term abject fear on the part of opposing pitchers and the latter indicates a combination of speed, smarts and risk-taking hustle.

RIGHT FIELD: JOSE CANSECO

Uniquely and cluelessly candid, Canseco, was destined to be on this team. His resume includes 462 homers, 200 stolen bases, a Rookie of the Year Award, an MVP, six All-Star selections and two books about steroids - one for, one against.

CATCHER: MIKE PIAZZA

Piazza was the best hitting catcher of his generation and one of the best all-time. In a 16-year career, he hit 427 homers and batted .308, with a .377 on-base percentage.

PITCHER: ROGER CLEMENS

The Rocket has the distinction of being, by far, the winningest pitcher (354 victories and a .658 winning percentage) not in the Hall of Fame.

On the bench: Rafael Palmeiro (3,020 hits, 569 homers); and Sammy Sosa (609 homers).

The real fun to be had with this fantasy team is imagining its rollicking camaraderie in the clubhouse: the former Bash Brothers needling each other in a stall, Bonds and Kent exchanging conditioning tips, Piazza giving Clemens tickets to “Rigoletto,” Shoeless Joe whistling “Dixie” while unfurling the Confederate flag, Charlie Hustle not writing another book but again making book.

We’ll never know whether the All-Shunned All-Stars could beat Tuesday’s bunch, or whether they could stand up to the best Hall of Famers.

The point is, and you’ll be hard-pressed to disagree: It’s a heck of a team.

Robert Rubino can be reached at RobertoRubino@comcast.net.