Dear Abby: Husband tells family all of couple’s problems

Dear Abby: I have been with my husband for 10 years. Things are great, except for one major issue. Every time we get into a spat, he feels the need to air all of our dirty laundry to his family, which is now my family.

I am a private person. I don't like having other people in the middle of our drama. He tells his relatives his side of the story, and because they don't hear my side, they automatically assume he is some sort of victim. I then start receiving phone calls and text messages from everyone wanting to know what's going on and trying to give me advice. When I politely turn them down, they get angry and start lecturing me about how wrong I am.

This happens often, no matter how small the argument. What do I do? How can I get him to see how much it bothers me? I don't want the world to know what goes on in our home. Nothing I say gets through to him.

- Betrayed and Alone

Dear Betrayed: Your husband knows how much what he's doing bothers you. He just doesn't care. He knows that when he runs to his family he will have automatic allies.

It will take work with the help of an unbiased licensed marriage and family therapist for your marriage to improve. If your husband won't go with you - and he may not - you should go without him. Because of his level of immaturity, it's a wonder your marriage has made it this long without intervention.