Bob Padecky: Pure luck is no way to decide an epic football game

Usually it’s a quarter the referee flips. A quarter. A stupid quarter. I mean, what can you do these days with a quarter? Exchange it for 25 pennies? A down payment on a bag of potato chips? Throw it at the nerdy kid in math class who is smart and knows it? A quarter is practically worthless.

Except in the NFL. In this sport a quarter is coveted, desired more than an even a fat income tax return. The coin is flipped in the air and a fully grown beefy man is standing near it calling heads or tails while feeling incredibly stupid.

Sunday night that fully grown beefy man was Buffalo quarterback Josh Allen. He had just played in the most exciting game in NFL history. He had thrown what appeared to be the game-winning touchdown pass with 13 seconds left in the game only for Kansas City’s Patrick Mahomes to walk on water and lead the Chiefs to a game-tying field goal.

Josh had to be feeling good though. He was 9-0 in coin tossing this season - and I can’t believe I just wrote that. Feels like I just claimed Josh Allen was undefeated in pillow fighting and, boy, his mom must be proud.

Ah, but this is the NFL where is entirely legal to hit the snot out of someone but one minute later you’re feeling like you’re in elementary school flipping a coin with your buddy to see who gets the last donut.

“TAILS!” Allen called and now he has to live with that for the rest of his life and that stinks. The NFL somehow is comfortable with pure chance making more sense performance. This is Vegas and Allen lost. Of course Kansas City would take the ball. Of course you’d want Tom Brady - I mean Patrick Mahomes - to have the ball.

As everyone except those outside of our solar system seem to know by now - Mahomes moved his offense adroitly downfield to the winning touchdown. Allen’s response? He had none. By NFL overtime rules Kansas City won because a touchdown was scored on overtime’s first possession. Game over.

Josh Allen sat and watched and ground his teeth. His team lost the coin flip. That should have as much influence on the outcome of the game as burping a burrito in the second quarter.

Imagine this conversation Allen had with himself: “What was I thinking? I always liked Heads. ‘Josh has a good head on my shoulders’. That’s what people always said about me.”

Imagine baseball doing its own version of this disrespect. It’s the top of the 10th inning and the A’s score a run. Sorry, Giants. You don’t get to bat. Dems the rules.

Imagine the coin flip in the NBA Finals. Steph Curry calls heads and it’s heads. If Curry makes a 3-pointer, game over. If not, the Bucks’ Giannis Antetokounmpo tries his luck.

Of course the NFL claims this rule change always comes up for discussion every league meeting: Each team gets a chance to score in overtime. And then the idea gets pushed to the curb like bad garbage. No one has came forth and explained why.

That’s because no one likes to be identified publicly as having the common sense of the common earthworm. The best attempt at an explanation comes on a note passed under the committee’s door so no one knows the author.

Reason: The team that lost the coin toss had plenty of opportunity to win the game. Now you can see why no one is publicly identified with this reason.

The team that won the coin toss had the same opportunity.

Is there another reason that makes sense?

If there is, please identify yourself. You must be over the age of 6 to participate because right now the only explanation given appears to be written by a 6-year-old.

Explains the NFL: “As with many NFL rules the rules governing overtime have evolved over time.”

The author of the preceding sentence now must go back to class because recess is over.

Interesting to note that the Chiefs themselves were once on the other side of the coin (so to speak). After the 2019 AFC title game the Chiefs proposed that each team has a chance to possess the football. One could understand the motivation behind such a proposal: In that overtime game the Patriots won the coin toss and drove the length of the field for a touchdown that won the game.

Patrick Mahomes watched that one as Josh Allen watched Sunday. A coin toss decides a winner? Why not play “Rock, Paper, Scissors”? At least it’s three chances. In fact why not roll the dice? Why not tarot readings? How about a fat guy from each team in a sack race? Could any of this be less unfair?

Each team getting an overtime possession is easy to understand. This time, the prediction is, the NFL finally will understand. Sunday was not good for business. It took a thrill and crushed it. It removed the very thing a playoff game should provide - when people in the stadium or in the recliner lean forward, gripping their neighbor or an armrest.

The NFL benched Josh Allen Sunday. That sentence should embarrass the league. That remains to be seen. The NFL has a difficult time blushing. Mistakes are a sign of weakness.

To comment write to bobpadecky@gmail.com.