Family, community mourns gifted Petaluma preschool teacher killed by boyfriend

Cheri Still-Leuzinger glances at the Willow Tree School parking lot every day at 7:56 a.m. during her short walk to the campus. She looks for one spot in particular, to check if Lauren McCrum’s car is there.

It’s a habit Still-Leuzinger, owner of the Petaluma preschool, developed over the last seven years as she watched her “righthand gal” grow from an assistant to a head teacher and staff lead.

McCrum, 28, was rarely late. So when she didn’t show up the morning of Oct. 2, and none of the other teachers had heard from her, Still-Leuzinger knew something was wrong.

Police found McCrum dead in her downtown Petaluma home, the victim of an apparent homicide at the hands of her boyfriend of more than two years, 34-year-old Joseph Beaver. Investigators said he later drove his motorcycle into oncoming traffic on Highway 101 on purpose, and died after crashing into a car. The driver of that vehicle suffered major injuries and was rescued by a passerby after the car caught fire.

Her tragic death has gutted the McCrum family — her parents, Don and Patty, her older sister Emily, and her aunt, Lee — and sent shock waves through Petaluma. The community has rallied around them, donating nearly $70,000 in various crowdfunding campaigns to cover child care and education costs for her 5-year-old daughter, Lyla McCrum, a loving and thoughtful kindergartner left in the wake of this tragedy.

McCrum’s death also has left a massive hole in the close-knit Willow Tree school community, in which she touched an untold number of families as a gifted teacher with a knack for not just amplifying a child’s strengths, but seeing the beauty in what others dismissed as flaws.

“I still expect her car to drive in at 7:56 every day,” Still-Leuzinger said. “It’s going to take a while to get used to looking out that window and not seeing her.”

McCrum was a Petaluma native and Casa Grande High School graduate who was fun-loving and laughed often, her mother Patty said. “She had a go-with-the-flow attitude and was never one to complicate things.”

Lauren was a calming presence who was reliable and always willing to lend a hand, according to people who knew her. She was shaped by her family and those that influenced her life in some way, her mother said.

“She was everything a father could want in a daughter and a child could need in a mother,“ her father Don McCrum said.

Lauren was a few courses shy of completing the childhood development and teaching program at Santa Rosa Junior College. She became serious about a career in early childhood education after years of babysitting, her sister Emily McCrum said.

Since Lauren’s death, Still-Leuzinger said countless Willow Tree parents have shared stories about her kindness or her grace. Many praised her willingness to step beyond the role as teacher and share thoughtful tips with parents for navigating challenging moments in those early years raising a child.

As a former teacher and now a school curriculum developer at Adobe, Magda Gross appreciated that. Her son Max is talkative and some days his emotions can get the better of him, but “there was something about a child’s spirit she understood,” Gross said.

Lauren helped him see his energy as his “brilliant brain” at work.

“We love his brilliant brain,” Gross said. “And now he talks about it himself, ’I love my brilliant brain.’ That was always how she framed it — in these strengths.”

Gross and many other mothers developed a sense of sisterhood with Lauren when conversations became more personal, and bonded over shared challenges, such as being a single parent.

But the extra attention Lauren provided to other families, and her unflappable ability to shine every day as a teacher, may have shielded others from knowing the depth of her personal struggles.

Bailey Malone, 35, has been a Willow Tree parent for five years, and her son Callum was taught by Lauren multiple times during his tenure at the school. Malone said she left a permanent imprint in her eldest child, and was devastated to learn the extent of what such a valued teacher had experienced at home.

“She was always so warm and calm and steady and loving,” Malone said. “She deserved that kind of love for herself.”

Lauren’s relationship with Beaver initially sewed discord in the family once they learned about his past, her sister Emily McCrum said.

In fall 2015, he was found guilty on domestic violence charges and coercing a witness, and sentenced to three years in prison and four years of probation, court records showed. Anonymous testimony from the victim in court proceedings included descriptions of violent assaults and death threats, according to a ruling from an appellate judge in 2016, who reaffirmed the county’s verdict.

Attempts to reach Beaver’s family for comment were unsuccessful.

Lauren “believed in the good in him and wanted to make it work,” her older sister said. And about one year into the relationship, there was a noticeable shift. He was apologetic about his behavior, and “seemed like a different, better person,” her sister said.

Even though he wasn’t Lyla’s biological father, she started calling him “daddy,” Emily said.

“They both seemed happy and in love,” her sister said. “We all started to have family functions together and spend actual time getting to know each other. Recently there was talk of marriage and having a baby together.”

It was only after Lauren’s death that the family learned about physical and verbal abuse during their relationship.

“I was sickened by the words I was hearing from the police,” her mother Patty McCrum said, of when she was told what happened. “I screamed out in agony for my child and couldn't believe this was happening to me. I still don't believe this has happened to our family.”

Petaluma Police Department is still investigating the murder, awaiting digital and toxicology results before turning over its findings to the Sonoma County District Attorney’s Office for review.

McCrum’s murder has affected the police investigating it, including Det. Sgt. Paul Gilman, who said it triggered flashbacks to the Kim Baucom Conover case in April 2012. She, too, was a domestic violence victim and teacher killed in a murder-suicide on a downtown Petaluma street.

Police have not identified a specific motive yet in the McCrum case, or an explanation for why that day ended with two deaths.

“These are those cases that hang with you for a long time,” Gilman said. “We get in this job to help people … but in this incident we were unable to prevent Lauren’s death. I don’t know what we could’ve done differently.”

While the McCrum family mourns their lost daughter, they have also had to navigate complex legal hurdles to get custody of Lyla. Her biological father is not in the picture, but McCrum’s sister Emily and her fiance have stepped in to take custody of the girl.

The family said they have been overwhelmed by the amount of support they’ve received, and found comfort in the stories they’re heard, learning about Lauren’s legacy shaping multiple generations of Willow Tree students.

For some, her legacy lives through Lyla, an adventurous McKinley Elementary School student who loves dancing and is eager to lend a hand just like her mother.

The McCrum family think there is no justice after this tragedy, and closure will not come easily. Their hope is other domestic victims speak up, unafraid of judgment or consequence, so no other family is forced to live through a similar experience.

“If anyone is in this type of situation they should do everything in their power to get out,” her mother Patty McCrum said.

You can reach Staff Writer Yousef Baig at 707-521-5390 or yousef.baig@pressdemocrat.com. On Twitter @YousefBaig.